Paper Cup: The Lost Diary of Lindemans

Listen all y'all it's a Belgian Beer, Listen all y'all it's a Belgian Beer!

I can't stand it, you know I drank it

I'm gonna set it straight, this beer is great

I can't stand this cup for this Belgian beer

And the beer itself, ain't so crystal clear

So while you sit back and wonder why

I got this fucking cup at my side

Got it at the store, which was mostly a bore

I'm telling y'all this Kriek is sweet

That was way too hard. I'm half drunk, and trying to turn "Sabotage" into a beer review about Lindermans Kriek was draining all of my brain powers. In 2 hours, that was all I came up with.

About 10 years ago, I bought my first Lindermans. I'm almost 100% it was the strawberry Lambic. I drank the whole thing, and threw up. I'm pretty sure it was the Lambic. Ok, so maybe i'm like, 25% sure, but it was thick, sweet and reminded me of cough syrup. Yeah, definitely the Lambic. I drank the whole thing, and regretted it nearly immediately.

When I was in Kentucky, sometimes it was the lesser of the two evils, so I picked this one up. Along with a 6 pack of Sam Adams "White Lantern." And then I drank them. And that's all I remember. I took notes, and then proceeded to forget all about these note for months. Recently I have stumbled upon them, and said to myself "Fuck it. Do it up, homeboy." The following is what I was able to decipher from the scribbled notes

-Smells like Hosmer Mt. Black Cherry soda.

-Looks pinkish/red. Pink fuzzy head.

-Taste? Awesome! For beer drinkers who don't know they are beer drinkers.

-Tastes like candy/soda.

-Mouth isn't as syrupy as I expected it to be.

-But holy fucking sweet.

That is just the first side. I really liked this beer, but it is super sweet. While I drank it, I got a bright idea to mix it with the Sam Adams I had. That's how I party, yo.

Mix #1 75% Kriek 25% White Lantern

-OK. Sweet is still overwhelming

-Spices are subdued. Mostly dilutes Kriek, but not by much.

Mix #2 50% Kriek 50% White Lantern

-Excellent. Perfect combination with spice/sweetness.

Mix #3 25% Kriek 75% White Lantern

-VERY GOOD.

HAD TO STOP TOO SWEET

This is why I cant have nice things.

THE

SCRAWLINGS

OF

A

MAD

MAN...